Your decision-making abilities and self-image predict your success


"Success and failure are the results of the use of mind. Every success-motivated mind has been a decisive mind. Every failure-motivated mind has been an indecisive mind. Only the dreamer who acted with a decision on his dream brought forth something new and valuable."

Raymond Charles Barker said this in his book The Power of Decision. Did you know, the word decide comes from Latin origin and literally means to cut off other options? When you make a decision, cut off any other options, then the wishy-washy washes away, and you have an opportunity to move forward with the determination, passion and joy to accomplish whatever it is you have set yourself out to accomplish.

This reminds me of the story in Napoleon Hill's Think and Grow Rich about burning the ships. Do you remember the story where men facing an impossible battle were ordered to burn their own ships, so there was no way to retreat, they either win the battle or perish? And they won.

Napoleon Hill writes a lot about the decision making in the book, I believe because indecision is the cancerous cell that causes self-doubt. Together they end up paralysing you from moving forward. He encourages us to take quick decisions. Any decisions and correct them later on, but not to stay in that indecisive situation.

Ok, let's go back to Raymond Barker. He was a leading New Thought teacher. He believed that we all have the divine intelligence that we can tap into and use that to express our life purpose.

He also reminds us that we inherently know what we need to do. We know what the right decision is. We do know what the truth to ourself is if we choose to tap into that divine intelligence.

In light of that, how often you hear yourself saying I don't know what to do, I am overwhelmed or confused? That is you knowingly cutting yourself off from the solution. The solution which would be available to you should you listen to your inner guidance, should you tap into the divine intelligence available for everyone.
I get it, a little painful to hear it said like this, but then again, getting some self-awareness is not a bad thing - after all, it is a foundation of all the personal growth.

You cannot speak about personal growth without understanding your self-image and the way you view yourself. In his book, Barker also said something that touched me very deeply. He said:

You can not go beyond your own self-accepted image. As long as you underestimate yourself, you cannot succeed in life.

I felt his words deep in my gut as I read them. Looking back by 48 years of existence on this planet, this has haunted me the most. I still work on this not-good-enoughness today. This, I know for sure. It's not like you go about your day thinking about how not good enough you are. No, it comes like wind over you as you open the door and step outside your comfort zone. Here is the kicker. As long as you stay out in the wind, it is bearable, when you retreat back into the comfort of your old thoughts and habits, that is when the pain begins. As if that is the proof you needed to know that in the end, you were not good enough. And sadly, you then feel like you were right about yourself all along.

Here is also something I know for sure. It is me and everyone else. We are in the different places on our journey, but these feelings of not measuring up are within us all, and we have to work through them.

They will not go away with the will power, because they are coded in our subconscious mind. Therefore we have to go there to change the beliefs we hold about ourselves.

The more we learn about the neuroscience, the more we understand that we can literally introduce new ideas to our subconscious minds, because the beliefs are stuck in a timewarp. These beliefs live in a time when you were a little girl when something happened, and others laughed or shamed you. Whatever it was back then, that made you feel less or lacking. Like all unwanted clutter that experience then accumulated a lot of similar experiences around that moment, giving you the validation of that belief. Exactly like my feeling of not-enoughness. And to fight that, your best weapon is your adult perspective.

You can begin every day. As long as we are alive, no matter what happened the day before we have the luxury to start over every single day. It is comforting to know, you will never be perfect, you will never get it exactly right, and you will never arrive. I believe that the moment you let go of your aspirations is the moment you begin to shrink. To me, it means life is about little incremental betterments done daily, even hourly or minute by minute if needed.

Go at it, with everything you got.
Like a man whose hair is on fire is seeking the pond. (That will be a story for another time.)

Much love,
Mari

PS. So I know you are indecisive about how to play out 2020. Book a clarity call and let's map it out for you. My free gift to you. <3


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